The End of a Sarah?

Last night, I finished the last of the brownies that my mother-in-law made while she was visiting. On the one hand, I was relieved. Their absence will shed a good 3,000 calories from my daily intake. But, on the other hand, I know I’m really, really going to miss them. It was definitely bittersweet to say goodbye.

Similarly, I felt torn when I read this recent Washington Post article about Sarah Palin called “The End of Sarah Palin Is Here." 

On the one hand, good riddance to the war she has been waging on grammar and coherent sentences since she was catapulted into the national spotlight over eight years ago. But, on the other hand, dude, Sarah, it’s been over eight years. I have a book coming out in a couple of weeks that bears your name in the title. You couldn’t have waited like another six months.

But, wait, there’s another way to think about this. When Kobe Bryant announced his retirement, the value of his trading cards shot up to $100,000. When Derek Jeter announced his retirement, ticket prices skyrocketed from $15 to $300. Sure, the article didn't claim that Sarah was actually retiring, just that she had shut down her Sarah PAC, but, still, better safe than sorry.

In other words, guys, you should all buy my book before it becomes way too expensive. It comes out March 7, but you can totally pre-order it. Here’s the link! Hurry! 

Photo by T toes from Decatur, USA - palinwave, CC BY 2.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=4722408

Drawing the Line

It’s too bad Trump doesn’t want to build a wall on the Canadian border because I’m pretty sure the Canadians would pick up the tab to keep out their (rumored to be) new U.S. ambassador: Sarah Palin. Well, that’s what I gather from the tweets that they wrote in response to the news:   

·      Dear Mr. Trump: Rather than appoint Sarah Palin as ambassador to Canada, please bomb us. Signed, all intelligent life in Canada. ‪

·      Sarah Palin is being considered for job as ambassador to Canada. She's presently on a flight to Europe to meet with us.

·      If Sarah Palin becomes our ambassador can we appoint Justin Bieber to be our ambassador for the US?

But the news wasn’t just met with awesome Canadian humor. It was met with some serious Canadian ire. In an op-ed, one columnist wrote that Palin “represents the descent of politics” and that there’s a “direct line from Palin to Trump.”

I’m fascinated by the idea of this direct line from Palin to Trump because the notion that Palin introduced something that Trump concluded totally matches their tweeting writing styles. 

Palin’s tweets are all introduction. She often begins her tweets with nothing more than a strong word or phrase designed to whet the reader’s appetite to click on her link:

Trump, on the other hand, is a closer. He likes to end his tweets with a bang by concluding with an emphatic word or phrase: 

C'mon, Canada. Don't you want an ambassador who's a direct line to EASY D?

Photo by Alex Hanson - Flickr, CC BY 2.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=46639276

You Spell Potato; I Spell ...

These first two paragraphs of my book’s introduction introduce (obviously) one of the issues that prompted me to write a Sarah Palin writing skills book:

I teach English at a fashion college. In other words, my students have no idea why they have to take my class, nor do they want to take my class. They signed up to explore the world of fabric and sketches, not commas and semicolons. Therefore, on the first day of class, I go in for the hard sell. I tell them that unless they learn how to write clearly and concisely they will be doomed to a future of styling their childhood Barbie doll instead of styling Taylor Swift for the Grammys. I tell them that if they don’t learn how to properly employ a comma or structure a sentence the only line they will play a role in creating is the one in front of the unemployment office.

Okay, I’m not that harsh, but I do remind my students that until they do actually become the next Chanel and can afford to hire someone to write their website copy, emails, and Facebook posts, they need to learn to communicate clearly, concisely, and coherently. They need to support their points with concrete, specific examples to prove that they are knowledgeable.  They need to learn proper grammar because it is often used as a barometer to measure intelligence and attention to detail, and they’re going to need to convey those characteristics in their cover letters and résumés. Basically, I let them know that if they don’t learn to communicate clearly, concisely, coherently, concretely, and correctly, they can’t hope to amount to much— just, perhaps, the 2008 vice presidential candidate of the United States of America.

And, of course, it’s not just Sarah Palin who often fails to communicate clearly and correctly. We had Dan Quayle’s “potatoe.” We had George W. Bush and his important question: “Is our children learning?” And we currently have a president who once composed a tweet that included this gem of a sentence: “If not, there blood, sweat and tears was a total waist of time.” ("Waist of time" makes me think of the thin, middle part of the hourglass.)

So what do you think? If U.S. presidents, vice presidents, and vice presidential nominees don’t employ proper grammar, is it still fair to claim that it’s important for success?